My throat is as dry as the Sahara desert; my nose seems to be running a marathon (and it’s doing bloody fantastic, if you ask me); and every now and then I’d feel like lighting has struck my head (literally).
I’ve been this way for a couple of days now, since all my aunts, uncles and cousins arrived last week (hooray for family reunions!). I’m not exactly sure who gave this to me. Out of the 26 of us in the house, 12 of us are sick. But we’re all having the time of our lives and I really do mean that. I’ll probably make a separate post about that later because, you know, family deserves its own blog post.
Anyway, I’ve come to realize something about me: I have a tendency to think extremely random thoughts when I’m sick. I don’t know where they come from. Wait, no, that’s not true. They come from my brain, obviously, but I don’t know how it comes up with these thoughts and ideas. Said ideas being the following:
1. What does a man with big, afro hair look like when his hair gets wet? I mean, does it succumb to gravity when it’s drenched or does it just stay the same way?And if it does become like any normal, wet hair, what does it look like as it starts to dry? When exactly in the drying process does the hair stick up again?
2. If I were a man, would I date me? Not to sound conceited, pretentious or anything, but I kind of think I would. I’d definitely not tire my man-self out going shopping because the longest I could last walking inside a mall is an hour or two; any longer and that’s torture. My man-self won’t get broke dating me because I don’t like it when a guy pays for everything; I prefer we take turns. And I appreciate a lot of things that most guys are definitely in to (like sports, comics and computer games). But I guess I’d date me mostly because I don’t appreciate things that guys also don’t appreciate (like cheesy romance movies, pedicures and vegetarian food).
3. How did the dumb blonde joke start? I mean, did it all really start with a dumb blonde? And was she really that dumb to actually make one big joke about it? And why is it always assumed that the dumb blonde is a she? There are blonde guys too.
4. Are food critics good chefs and is that how they become critics or are they just, you know, naturally good at critiquing food?
If you know the answers to any of these totally life-changing questions, feel free to answer them! I’m particularly curious about what your answers are for the second question. If you were a man (or a woman), would you date you?